Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Free cookies anyone?


Everyone knows the easiest way to get more people to show up somewhere is to offer free stuff. An even better way to to get more people to show up somewhere is to offer free food. Yes, I take bribes and I prefer calories. Take note. In high school the Fellowship Christan Athletes (FCA) met each Friday in the school auditorium to make themselves feel superior to everyone and pay penance for doing the dirty and drugs the previous weekend, I mean, praise god. I also would attend FCA meetings...for the free chicken biscuits :) In college, I only attended the National Society of Colliegete Scholors meetings because they offered free pizza (no wonder I decided to become president of NSCS) nom nom nom. Now, I work in an industry where thousands of people plan their Tuesday based on who is serving the best free lunch. So for the most part these organizations offer up the goods with getting little in return. That doesn't seem very fair. Luckily, I have just the ticket of a mutually beneficial relationship to share. Who wants free cookies?! Read on...

You are welcome to a smorgasbord of decedent, sugar filled cookies for just one hour of your time! I know, amazing. And what does the other party get from me you ask? Well, they get to your blood. MUUUUWAAHAHAHAH! No no no, you are not getting throated by Rob Pattison or the hot bad vamp from True Blood. You are getting pricked by a lovely lady or gentleman in a white coat dawning a smile and plastic gloves. We are talking blood donation kids and it is time to spread the word. I am the only person I know who regularly gives blood and I think more people should be like me...haha. Seriously though, donating blood takes less that one hour, it saves three lives each time and you get FREE COOKIES!!! My blood donation center even offers samoas...year round. You tell me where I can find a samoa in July! Ok, so you are scared of needles? You don't like blood? Waaaa waaa waaa... get over it. It seriously is a prick that hurts LESS than biting your own tongue AND for literally half a second. I don't like blood either. So the lovely nurses kindly drape a cloth over my oh so yummy veins so I don't have to see a thing. And all this takes place while I am watching my favorite food network show during my lunch break. After my life saving is complete, I am rewarded with my free cookies. Oh and they offer you juiced too!

I think everyone reading this blog (yes, all 8 of you including you mom) should make a commitment to at least try giving blood this month. I mean, worst comes to worst, you freak out and they will probably still give you a cookie. Maybe not a samoa though fyi. To find a blood donation center near you click here.

Now, run along kiddos and spread the word about how to get free cookies. You never know whose life you could save :)